My name is Alex and I have never been suicidal but these last 3 weeks have changed me. I have gone from being engaged to being suicidal. I have NEVER had anything in my life depress me, I mean, I have two pending court cases lots of other stuff that really stresses me but not to the point of being suicidal. Why you ask? Not love. Lies, betrayal, more lies and lastly regret. Here’s my story.
I have been in a serious relationship for 6 years now. Doing everything together … shopping … finances…etc until March 2015 just after we got engaged. After that weekend, I got cheated on the next week Tue. I believe in dialogue. I asked why. Quite frankly she said she doesn’t know why. And since she’s slept with 4 other guys, I said enough is enough. I ended that. Moved on.
Now what really got me is that since our engagement was in Mombasa Southern Palms, we bought some gifts for friends and all that. So she said, “Swirie, I want you to buy a hand beaded bracelet for my friend Martin” which I did. It’s like the one attached.
Now after I have come to learn that Martin is this guy, I have never been able to let that slide. Walai nimejaribu but f*ck! I bought a present for the same guy who WAS/IS f*ucking her! That really messed me up. It crushed me. It’s one thing to sleep with her but it’s another for me to fund it and buy a gift for him. Think about it. That has broken me up psychologically.
Now while still trying to deal with that, this is what happened today. When we broke up, we were mature. No need for the tantrums and all that. And since we used to live together [We were supposed to get married this year], she had to move out so I said okay fine, I will help you move out. Buy new house stuff and all. So she looked for a house, I paid the rent [12,500] and today was the moving in. So I bought a bed, mattress, cooker, gas etc… All that stuff. Rem, I am doing this to help her.
So there is me and some hired guys with Mkokotenis and running up and doing TRM. By 7 pm, she had everything. Now here is the part that has just landed the last blow. She had forgotten her one handbag at my place so we agreed I bring it as the last item. I drove to Roysambu and when I got back, here is Martin at the gate!
I mean after doing everything for her, and when the house is ready, that f*cker appears! Man I just felt like crap! Up to now I still do feel that. I know the love is not there but I felt so disrespected. Couldn’t even wait I drop the hand bag and go. It felt to me like the ni madharau. After everything I just did.
What has really driven me down…
That guy is not like Usher Raymond/CB/…etc. I mean I know for sure I am more handsome. Doesn’t the general rule say that we only f*ck upwards not downwards?! That has really perplexed me. Makes me wonder nina shida gani!
I have done everything for this girl…paid her school fees…applied jobs for her [even did the aptitude tests] till she got one…bought her a car…gave her money [In tunes of millions] but yet she isn’t satisfied. I have even asked her and she has no answer!
Yea cheating I can live with that. But all this? Disrespect afterwards…even after all my sacrifice? No.
Lessons to everyone else. Don’t end up like me.
A whore is a whore…No matter what.
Never invest in a relationship – Moneywise.
Family first, always.
To my family,
I love you guys. I will always do. I’m sorry. Hope you understand. And please try to forgive me. Delvine murdered me. Not by her cheating. That I could live with [I have lived with it]. It’s what she did after that I can’t bear. I wish I had lessons on how to handle this. Maybe it would be different. My will is on the table.
Alex
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